Mystoryofdomesticabuse.de

Tuesday, December 17, 2024

Why no answers ?




 Just like Spring will always follow Winter , happiness can also follow saddness.....


No one can predict what a persons future will hold , so that's why it's so important to make the most of every single moment . No one can predict what a future partner could be like either , the person you first meet can sometimes turn into your worst nightmare.  

  Those that domestically abuse someone else are the grand masters of camouflaging their true selves , they are extremely well rehearsed with what they say or do at the beginning because they want to portray themselves as the perfect one . Unfortunately as time goes by things change and before you know it you can find yourself suffercating under the weight of abuse .

   I've never successfully worked out if it's learnt behavour , a mental disorder or a combination of both , but one thing I have noticed over the years is that in a lot of cases that either one or both of the abusers parents or who ever raised them were very similar in their ways ( true in my ex abusers case ) . The way their brains ended up being all wired up wrong must of started somewhere but how or why is just one of those many unanswerable questions. 




  You could sit for endless hours like I once did trying to be a psychologist over the deep and meaningful reasons why any abuser would do what they do but at the end of the day it's still uncalled for domestic abuse and the only person who is really deeply effected by it all is the victim . There's isn't and never will be a good enough excuse for their actions and the all time classic excuse of " you made me do it " is simply just pathetic. 

  Why should those that manage to finally escape and survive domestic abuse suffer for something they never did ?.......

They weren't the ones hitting out physically or emotionally but still they are left with the mixed up feelings of guilt . Even after all this time I still carry the guilt of why I tolerated it for as long as I did and why did I ever allow my children to suffer being witness to it , it's a feeling that will never leave me but I keep it tucked up safely away so no one will ever notice it .


DOMESTIC ABUSERS HAVE A LOT TO ANSWER FOR  !!!!! ðŸ¤¬


   One of the biggest insults a domestic abuser can ever give is playing their own version of the domestic abuse card , I know of cases where just because the abuser is female , they have successfully cried their fake tears and had everything handed to them on a plate by blaming the person they were abusing.. ......not fair on so many levels and outrageous that their case wasn't investigated into further .

One day maybe domestic abuse towards men will be treated the same as it is to women but I unfortunately can't see it happening in my lifetime . It's hard enough for anyone to admit about any form of abuse they may of suffered but in a strange way its tougher for the men out there and there certainly isn't nearly the same kind of support given to them .

 I know I've asked this question before but why do Father's sometimes have to fight tooth and nail to prove their innocence in order to get custody of their children when the mother automatically gets them even if they were the abuser ?.........




   Things are improving slowly about punishment for those the domestically abuse but it could be better , laws are gradually changing over time and people are talking about it more but the subject will always be a massive elephant in the room sometimes . 

It never ceases to amaze me just how quite a room can become once you declare you were domestically abused , people have no idea how to react and in some cases will even go out of their way to change the subject matter .

  Personally I will never be ashamed or embarrassed of my dark unforgettable past and its one of my many reasons as why I'm more than happy to discuss it , I refuse to allow my ex abuser to think they can just slither away quietly and get away with it all and to then start again on some other poor defenceless unsuspected victim . I am now not and never will afraid of the revolting slime bag that once abused me and if it ever finally dawns on them that I've been shouting out to the world about my story then tough !!!!!

     I wonder what would happen if all the domestic abusers of this world ended up having to live on the same island together ?........🤔




   Just imagine the chaos they could all create , each and everyone of them would want to be Top dog and they would all tell each other how hard done by they were . None of them of course would except the blame for anything and eventually they will start the own version of the classic book Lord of Flies .

  Like I said at the start of this post , you can't even try to understand the mind set of a domestic abuser, you would end up none the wiser as to why they do what they insist on doing to others and you'd only end up more confused than when you first started. 

The abusers of this world are certainly a unique bunch and that's for sure .

                 ---------------------------

To finish here is my positive thought of the day......

   Butterflies close their wings when it starts to rain so they can't get damaged because their fragile ....

     Why not be like the butterfly 🤔






   


  


 




  


    

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Christmas Eve .

  " Twas the night before Christmas , when all through the house not a creature was stirring not even a mouse "                   ...