Saturday, November 18, 2023
That's an easy and simple one to answer..... I love life !!!!
PTSD has its annoying tendency to try and sneek up on me unexpectedly but I've now learnt to spare it an odd hour or so , I share a cup if tea with it and then I shove it right back kicking and screaming to where ever it came from !!
I refuse to allow that all too dismal part of my past life to overtake all the positives I now have in life , if I let it overtake me then it means my now ex is still succeeding to rule my world and trust me that is something that will never happen again.
Grey days like today where there's almost constant rain in it's many various soggy forms and the trees have almost lost their golden autumn glow won't put me off enjoying what I now have in life , granted Its a bit to much on the wet side to enjoy sitting in the garden with a brew and a bacon sandwich or sitting at a lakeside fishing and listening to the birds song but as the saying goes " it's not bad weather only bad clothing " so the dog will still get walked and I will keep watching the skies for that ever possible glorious rainbow .
Positive thinking isn't something that everyone finds easy to do, especially after something like domestic abuse . It's not a particularly pleasant place to find yourself in and it's equally not always as an easy place to get yourself out of either.
Not every victim of abuse is as lucky as I was and they just can't find the inner strength to either close the door to their abuse or to just keep on living ( that's exactly how bad domestic abuse can take over your life ) , those that have never been there will never totally or fully understand exactly how over powering , dark and extremely lonely abuse can be and that's exactly why after telling my story at the beginning of all of these posts I've continued writting.
I don't care how many see it all , understand it or read any of it ( I do but not in a selfish way ) , but what I do really care about is reaching out and being there for others who unfortunately find themselves in a similar position. I count myself extremly lucky to be able to do what I'm now doing, and yes I fully intend to just keep on going with it for as long as .
I proudly shout out that I'm now a survivor of domestic abuse on here , Facebook , Instagram , Quora , Threads and X ( blog email can be found in profile if needed ) because no one has the right in life to abuse anyone . My mission is now to at least give just one person that self belief that yes there's a better life after domestic abuse and that life is so worth living .
As my profile says I'm now a really annoying positive thinking optimist , I can see sunshine on the most darkest of days and I fully believe I should share the positive all around , if I can survive my most darkest years and still manage to come out smiling at the end of it then so can anyone else , its not always as simple as it sounds but yes it can be done if you really want it . You just simply have to train your thinking into turning every negative into a positive, every bad day will be followed by a good one and that the best bit is that it's all out there completely for free !!
Domestic abusers of this world only seem to really care about one thing in life and that's making sure every single thing goes their own way , they can be reasonably decent individuals when this happens but it can only take one small word to change the entire situation into a danger zone, that one small word is ....
That one simple little word can indirectly bring with it both emotional and/or physical pain .
Now be honest with yourselves, is that the right way to live a happy good life ?....
I completely agree , life shouldn't involve spending your days dodging spiteful words or forceful fists .
Escaping and surviving any form of domestic abuse isn't as easy as others may think but that doesn't mean it can't be done , it just takes a major big keep of faith and putting your trust in other people's hands . There may be times when you might doubt your own thoughts and feelings but once you start that walk to freedom it's worth every single minute .
The recovery from abuse can be a constant on going thing but things can and will get better almost every day .
When I think back now to that submissive person I used to be I find myself wondering how the hell I let it all get that bad or let it go on for such a stupidly ridiculous amount of time . Was I really that scared of someone who was supposed to love or care for me or was I do wrapped up in trying to live my life without creating any ripples that I never noticed what happen ?.....
Now my life is my own , I still hate any forms of verbal or physical violence but if it happens I'm now more than capable of standing my own ground and as I've said before I can and will kick arse back if neeeded .
If your reading any of this and your thinking "I wish I could do that " then why not stop wishing and just do it instead.
Final photo used is yet again one of my own .
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