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Domestic abuse is just like walking in a mine field , you never know exacly when the next explosion could happen and it's always unexpected.....
It doesn't matter how hard you try to walk carefully around everything or how much you try to protect yourself , it will still happen . Those that domestically abuse never care about what their doing at the time and you can garrentee the blame will always be someone else's fault .
Naturally in their eyes at least they are and always will be the completely innocent party of all crimes commited .
Personally I think they just all come over as a bunch of incredibly sad and lonely individuals who obviously don't have the intelligence to know how to act like a civil decent human being . I can honestly say this because the few I've actually had the misfortune to meet don't seem to have a single respectable bone in their bodies.
Maybe their brains cells are all wired up differently , who can tell ? ...
They certainly all seem to run with the same sort of boiling red hot steam and all will blow their fuses at any given opportunity.
As a domestic abuse survivor of several years now , I can honestly say that in my time of recovery I've yet to work out any logical rhyme or reason as to why they all have to do what they do . Yes , a large part is I think perhaps learnt behavour but that still doesn't excuse their actions. There are so many questions and no way nearly enough answers when it comes to discussing domestic abuse .
Can you ever forgive a domestic abuser ?....
That is entirely up to the individual concerned , myself I feel absolutely nothing not even hate so I don't waste my time on forgiving anyone or anything. I am however stuck permanently with never being able to forget so I now use that energy to write these posts and encourage fellow domestic abuse victims.
This eternal postive thinker will never let those B@#£&?ds get me down !!!!!!!!!
I can genuinely and honestly say that I have no regrets in my choices I've made in life so far and that's because if I hadn't of lived the sort of life I have lived then I never would have never learnt from my mistakes . If I had never meet my abuser therefor my children would never exist and if the abuse never happened then I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing now .
It might be a simplistic way of looking at things but it works for me 😊.
Nowadays I refuse flatly to ever lose my temper or get angry with anyone because its all a big total waste of time and energy , I'd much prefer to just sit down and simply discuss things over a nice cup of tea or a glass of something alcoholic.......much more polite and civilised don't you think 🤔.
Domestic abusers can waste their lives away hating the world but no one else has to join in with them , let them eat away at themselfs with their own poisonous venom instead of taking it out on someone else .
How easy is it to have No Regrets?....
Actually it's a fairly surprisingly easy thing to do once you teach yourself the basics then the rest will just come naturally.
The trick is to try to do things that work for you , don't stress out worrying about what other people want or think they might need , basically try doing things for yourself instead .
Why live in the past ?...
you've already been there once , try living for the future instead it's much better place .
Domestic abuse doesn't need to be a life sentence , you can breakaway from it if you really want to. It's not an impossible distant dream because I've done it and survived it and if I can do it , so can anyone else . Why waste any more valuable precious years on someone who doesn't appreciate what they have . Time is a very special thing and people just don't seem to have nearly enough of it and your a long time dead so why not make the use of what you've got .
Regretting what you may of done or not done in life is a waste because if you can't fix it or change it then why worry about it , just concentrate on improving what you already have instead . Having No Regrets is by far a much better option because it makes an amazing solid base to build a strong life on , each and every year is another brick to add to an already powerfully exciting existence .
One of my own personal bonuses from surviving my years of extremely unpleasant events is I discovered I had a new found inner strengh , some people build strong walls around themselves to help protect their emotions but mine is on the inside instead , this hidden unseen to the naked eye strength and power has given my once deflated confidence a major burst of fresh recharge and no I tackle any challenge head on inside of hiding behind the sofa waiting for it all to go away .
Granted the feelings after escaping domestic abuse are all individually unique and for a while it can be a really mixed up bag of crazy but I quite like this one and use it to my advantage an a regular basis.
I am now my own all powerful personal superhero who never hesitates to come to the rescue when the unwelcome things try to knock on my door . No one will ever try to rule my little world for me ever again !!
Never regret anything in life just learn from it instead , never wallow in your own rivers of self pity and most importantly learn to accept yourself exactly the way you are because once you begin to love yourself, someone else will do it too.
