Mystoryofdomesticabuse.de

Thursday, December 19, 2024

Be bold and be brave .

  



" Be bold , be bold but not too bold least your hearts blood should run cold."


                 ------------------------------------


  I wish I could remember which story this quote came from , but I clearly remember it once being read in my class at school when I was young and this part staying in the back of my mind ever since . If I remember rightly it's all about you can think your bold to a certain point but if it's done for all the wrong reasons then there could be unwanted consequences. 

     Those who survive domestic abuse and want to rebuild their lives again have to be unbelievable strong and brave to make that first decision , it can be extremely scary at the beginning, there's no instruction manual , no medals and certainly no rules to follow  . It's just a majorly massive case of taking a big deep breath and making that jump to freedom .

That first decision is the key to opening the door that leads to a brand new amazing adventure and then it's a case of taking one step at a time and following the path that lays ahead .

       




    Always try to travel that path forward and never back because you've already been there once .


 The journey can sometimes be a bit unstable and bumpy at times but there are people out there that can and will help ( for example, we have Women's Aid here in England ) . Its making the first phone call or sending the email that's the nerve wreaking bit but after that things get a whole lot easier , the trick is to be as honest and as open as you can be when talking to them and never forget they will listen to you . 

 I remember being totally gobsmacked when I made my first few calls , I couldn't believe just how kind , understanding and helpful other people could be and I will always be grateful for it . These were people who didn't know me , who had never heard my name before and didn't have to care......but they did .


  I will never forget that initial feeling of freedom and it was glorious !!!!!!!!


 

 Domestic abusers however don't just think their brave and bold , they actually believe it too , that's how arrogant and self centered they can be . They think they are perfect , superior and can do nothing wrong . They will push their luck at any given opportunity and not care less who stands in their way to get the end result .They  don't care who they hurt or how they do it  they will just lash out , stamp their feet and basically throw major temper tantrums just like a spoilt little child . 

  



 Never believe that they don't know what they're doing is painful because of course they know exactly what their appalling behaviour will get them if they keep doing it and that of course is always their own way. 

    As time goes by they get bolder with their actions , what started off as just little nudges or " constructive criticism " slowly begins to grow into hellish monster nightmare"s . The more they think they can get away with things the bolder they think they can become . They will stretch the truth out of all proportions , their lies become almost epic and their acting in front of others can be an Oscar winning performance . Then the time comes when they become almost too bold , they generally think that they are all super powerful . They don't believe their feeble and weak little victim would ever leave or abandon them , but that's where their wrong .  

This is the part in the story where their " blood should run cold " because their victim doesn't have to be one anymore , the victim now becomes the survivor and that is just the start of the revolution. 




   They will naturally try their best to twist and bend reality in order to get you to return to them and if that fails then that in turn will lead them to try to play the hard done by one whose completely innocent of all crimes . In fact they might even have the nerve to try to put the blame on you by telling people all sorts of tall tales about you , they will even try to get others to hate or dislike you . 

  Trust in whatever friends you've managed to keep because they will know you better and if they believe what their told by the abuser then they weren't really your true friends in the first place .

     The ultimate revenge on any domestic abuser is turning away from them and proving you can not only survive but you can quite happily live a much better life without them ( in fact quiet the total opposite as to what they lead you to believe) . They will go off and sulk for a bit and then start prowling around for a new innocent victim and even think it's funny to try and make you jealous about it . This to me shows exactly what complete and utter @#£#£@ they where ( fit your own appropriate swear word in here ) and that they never really deserved getting your attention in the first place .

  Once you've successfully escaped then the whole world can become your oyster , you are free to do whatever you want , wear whatever you want and be with whoever you want .

  No one will ever has the right to think they own you because you are a wonderful clear thinking outstanding individual who knows their own mind .


Now let's all be bold but not too bold ........


    Those whose glass appears to be half full have the privilege of refilling it when ever they want because they own their own glass !

  






  


  


  


   


   

  

  

 


   


 



  

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