Revenge.

 

As the old saying goes " Revenge is a dish best served cold " but can it work when applied to to those who have broken away from domestic abuse?....

  The answer to the above can all depend on the individual , how they want to go about it and if they felt they wanted to do it .  Yes , you could if you felt particularly vindictive and nasty enough attempt to try to treat your abuser exactly the same way they once treated you but that then leads to several other questions .

Would they actually notice what you were doing?...

Would they actually care  if you did it ?....

Would they then in return turn around and say  you were domestically abusing them ?....

Would you honestly feel any better if you decided to do it ?....

 Personally , no I don't think treating someone exactly the same way they treated you in this kind of situation would work very well because I'd like to think I'm a much better person than my now ex abuser is .

 I was brought up to always have good manners and be polite so treating someone with spiteful , hurtful words and actions goes completely against everything I was taught and that I believe in .

 I don't know about those reading this but it's not in my nature to want to be physically violent to anyone or anything , in my mind violence is never the correct answer to anything  . 

 Would writing a letter containing all the built up anxiety, tension and frustration and then sending it to a domestic abuser work ?......

 Maybe , but you have to rely on the fact they would actually want to read it it let alone understand what you were trying to say to them .

 I know for a fact that anything I wrote ( not that I would ever consider trying to do it and I wouldn't want to waste the paper ) would just straight away go in the nearest shredder like it and me never existed .

  

Could you go to the police to report them ?....

I guess that would all depend on how serious the abuse was and how much good quality proof or evidence you have to show it all happened . Some things when it comes to domestic abuse are almost impossible to prove , if there are only two people in the room and your being verbally abused you dont tend to remember to set things up to record what's going on because it can all happen so fast and unexpectedly .

   

So if none of the above seems a really good revenge option what else could someone do ?....

  This one is a really easy one to answer and it's a relatively easy one to do too  , is to just simply keep on existing. 

  I know for a fact that the one major and biggest thing that ultimately annoys my now ex is that not only am I still breathing but I'm also not quite as usless as I was once constantly told .

  Another thing that I think I can safely put down as my sort of revenge is the fact I'm not scared to tell the entire world that I was domestically abused and if I'm asked I'm more than happy to go into a few details . Revenge doesn't have to be the obvious kind of thing but sometimes just sometimes showing that your not afraid to be yourself can be the most powerful thing you can do .  

  

  I suppose the next big question would be is are there any benifits in getting revenge?....

  Yes and no , Yes because its showing that if your knocked down , you will always rise back up again and No because all revenge will do in the end is to keep crawling over the past instead of moving forward .

 What if the fact that those that have come out of the other side of domestic abuse already have the ultimate revenge?....

 

  It's the ultimate one because the survivor gets to live their life without any form of abuse thrown in their direction , they are free to enjoy their life. 

 The abuser will always remain the abuser regardless of who their next victim may be . They will brag about how fast and easy it was to replace their last one but we all know that going by their previous record the next one will wise up to being abused and then take the road to freedom ....the abuser then gets to start all over yet again .

  Survivors have their freedom to be true to themselves but the abuser will never be able to find that kind of inner peace because their minds are just wired up differently , they for whatever reason have a deep rooted insecurity and will never be fully relaxed and calm in their own space .

  Yes , absolutely I think I may of discovered the best way to take my own personal revenge and that's to remain being my true positive self  and its something any one else can do too . Being strong on the inside can be the equivalent of an ultimate super power and that super power can over ride absolutly anything that's chucked or blown in your direction .That deep rooted invincible inner super power can be mightier than any grip an abuser thinks they have over someone. Its stronger than any WWE wrestling champion and faster than Superman on a high , it can be totally invisable to the naked eye but the end results can still be seen and it can be as silent as a bird in flight .  Everyone has it and its down to the individual when and how its used .

   Never doubt that inner strengh and yes there may be times you think you may of lost it but I promise you it will always be there tucked up all safe and sound for when you really need it .