Never Give up .

 

 

Domestic abuse am I pr was I ever scared of it ?  I used to be but not anymore ............

   I was having a nice couple of drinks with some friends the other afternoon (something that would have been totally out of the question with my ex ) and one turned out to be an old neighbour from years ago so we ended up having a great amazing catch up  .

 This lovely ex neighbour remembered me being with my now ex and asked where he was , I explained that I had no idea and didn't care where he was or what the hell he was up to , that I hadn't been with him for a good few years now and as the drinks began to flow I explained more in detail .

 I spoke about everything just as I always do when writting these posts . Like I've said before I'm more than happy to talk about it and share my story to anyone that asks or wants to listern and I don't hold back with any of the information either ( yes the regular emotional blackmailed rape is included in the conversations too  ) .

 One very interesting thing that they mentioned to me was that although at the time I had lived in that particular road for just over 5 yrs and they recognised me straight away and knew my name but they said that they had never once met or spoken a single word to my ex . 

  This speaks volumes about how anti social a domestic abuser can really be . How can you live somewhere for years and not know or have any communication with any of your own close neighbours ? 

 It used to be one of those really nice lovely friendly roads where everyone knew each other , they helped each other out when it was needed and the children all knew and went to school together .

 But no the ex just hid himself away from all of this in his own special secret little barricaded Fort where in his small little mind he was the great all powerful master of everything and everyone .

One question I was asked by the neighbour   was am I not worried or concerned about what my ex would do or say if he ever found out what I was telling people ?.....

My answer was a massive great big NO !!!!! 

Why would I be worried about something that I didn't do ? I wasn't the abuser and  I've done nothing wrong . Why should I be scared of someone who isn't even man enough to offer any apologies to those he might hurt along the way .

 If the ex doesn't like what I'm saying or doing then that's his tough luck because he shouldn't have done it all in the first place . 

Abusers are nothing but big overgrown school bullies really and if someone bigger comes along the abuser can have a habit of then turning into nothing but a pathetic little shaking cowards .

They are the ones that should be worried not the ones they have abused . 

No I'm not and never will be worried or concerned because I now as I've said before now kick arse back and I won't ever let anyone try to take over or control my life again . If what I say or write isn't liked by the ex ( thats if he ever finds it or hears it of course ) then that's his problem not mine and at least what I'm saying is the truth and nothing like one of his many lies or over dramatic story's he likes to tell .

People who know me know me well and if they don't know me and chose to believe the ex then I don't want to know them and I dont care , its that simple .     

    Who or what others decide to believe is entirely up to them and which ever direction they decide to go is up to them too .  

 One other thing that I get mentioned to me occasionally is that I'm brave or inspirational to others for doing this but I disagree  and I honest don't think that I am , I'm just simply giving myself counselling or self help therapy as I go along and I have to say its all been going pretty good so far thank you very much 😊 .

I'm just putting out there all the crazy mixed up thoughts and feeling  that had been festering inside my head for years and to those that read or listern to me I owe a great deal of thanks to because I couldn't do any of it without you all . 

  To all those who have either been there like myself or are still battling agaist domestic abuse please never forget that you can honestly survive it and live your free life once again .

 I intend to keep on telling my story to others and to keep on going with these various posts because it's you guys out there that are helping me to help others and I couldn't do any of it without all your much needed and deeply valued support .

  

I know some just read blogs and then find something else afterwards without wanting or needing to follow people but there are also fellow victims out there who just quietly read and think " oh ..that's just like me but I'm not ready to admit it out loud yet " ( I know that feeling all too well because I was once like that ) .

 If you are one of those fellow silent victims then please follow and we can walk the road of recovery together . Check out my profile to to find my Blog email if anyone needs to scream , shout or swear about anything , all contact will remain 100% confidential . 

 There really is I promise a better life after domestic abuse and it really is honestly totally outstanding !!!!!